The Tony-Boy

tonyboy (2)Earthy, sweet, and smoky. 

My grandfather loved cognac.  His favorite drink involved pouring a large amount of Hennessy into Coca-Cola, and then stirring it up until all the bubbles were gone.  I thought the drink was disgusting (might as well have just poured the Hennessy straight into corn syrup), but after a few sips you were too drunk to notice.  So when my grandfather passed away earlier this year, we bought a case or two of Hennessy for the post-funeral reception.  We all gathered to celebrate my grandfather’s life and started off the festivities by drinking copious amounts of the cognac.

My role for the evening was as a cook; I spent most of my time in the kitchen preparing food or bouncing through the house topping off people’s drinks.  At the end of the evening when things were winding down, I stood in the kitchen talking with some of my relatives drinking cognac and coke.  Someone asked for a cup of coffee, so I made them one.  Now, it was most likely my level of inebriation and the power of suggestion (although I like to think it was my adventurous culinary spirit mixed with my zeal to be an originator) that caused me to pour some coffee into my cognac and coke.  My great-uncle gasped, “Boy, what the hell are you doing?!” to which my mother replied, “Have you met my son?”  But I was surprised by how the coffee played with the soda.  I made a note to myself to investigate further to see if I was onto something.

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The Tony-Boy

– 12 oz. of Coffee
– 24 cups of Water
– Coca-Cola
– Hennessy

No matter how many people like to think of themselves as mixologists and whip up something really fancy, simple is always better when it comes to cocktails.

I was excited to make a drink with coffee as I am a big fan of coffee and liquor mixed together, especially an Irish Coffee.  The perfect airport drink, the effect of the whiskey mixed with the buzz of caffeine always leaves me mellow yet motivated.  I have always felt that a day that starts off with Irish Coffee is going to lead to an adventure of grand and bizarre proportions: playing chess in the Russian district of your town with a guy who doesn’t speak a word of english and wears a bronze monocle, or shooting guns at old Ovaltine canisters in the middle of the desert while taking peyote and boiling cacti.

I’m gonna fight a bear . . . and then marry it.

Speaking of boiling, don’t do this with a hot cup of coffee.  A cold soda is refreshing, with little pops of coolness going off all over the place.  Heated bubbles, on the other hand, is like having a tiny police action going on in your mouth – there’s a lot of shouting and yelling, people are wearing riot gear, someone throws a rock, and then the firing begins.  It’s definitely an experience, but not a pleasant one.  As for the rest of the recipe:

  • Making iced coffee is like making normal coffee, except you use cold hot water and it takes all goddamn day.  You’re also going to have to make a lot of it, as all of the recipes for making iced coffee by the glass are not good at all.  Get a big container that’s made of plastic; something like a large pitcher, a 8 qt. container, or a –


So I used a bucket, what of it?! It was clean.

  • Pour in the coffee, 24 motherfucking cups of water, cover, and let sit at room temp for eight hours or overnight.
  • Put a cheesecloth on a wire mesh and strain the liquid.  This will take longer than you would expect.  Then chill in the fridge, and BAM!  Iced coffee.
    • Don’t go brewing a normal cup of coffee and then letting it cool; your mother raised you better than that.  The cold-brew method creates a mellower flavor that won’t get diluted if you put ice in it.

Don't be fooled, there's at least five times more of this stuff right off-camera.

Don’t be fooled; there’s at least five times more of this stuff right off-camera.

  • Fill a Collins glass with ice ¾’s with Coca-Cola.
  • I have explained my theory on the proportions of my cocktails before, but if you want to be a “moderate drinker”, a shot or two of cognac will suffice.
  • Fill the rest of the glass with iced coffee.

It’s a very interesting drink.  It’s almost as if Coca-Cola debuted a new coffee-flavored Coke, and then poured in Hennessy to class it up.  Good for a hot summer morning, the caffeine of the coffee and coke will pep you right up, and if it doesn’t you still got 20 more cups of the blasted iced coffee to make your heart sound like Gene Krupa.  I dare not say my grandfather would have liked it, but it will always remind me of him, so I have named it The Tony-Boy which was his nickname.


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